"For an answer Jesus called over a child, whom he stood in the middle of the room, and said, “I’m telling you, once and for all, that unless you return to square one and start over like children, you’re not even going to get a look at the kingdom, let alone get in. Whoever becomes simple and elemental again, like this child, will rank high in God’s kingdom. What’s more, when you receive the childlike on my account, it’s the same as receiving me."
Matthew 18:2-5 The Message
I don’t remember a time of not knowing God. God was just always there. I was born a Pastor’s kid, and well, I literally grew up IN the church. I didn’t know there were people who didn’t go to church, I just thought maybe they went to a different church.
It was just my way of life, honestly, even through a good portion of my adult life! I knew there were other faiths besides mine but they were no less important than mine, just different and I just thought everyone was a part of some kind of faith.
I started most days for as long as I can remember like I was writing a letter, Dear God… Again, right through a good portion of adulthood.
I didn’t like to pray out loud, because it sounded so juvenile but I started my day talking to God and continued it throughout the day, just picking up where I left off when it was quiet again.
I talked to God about, well, everything – my day, my worries, my tests, my family, my friends… I just rambled on to God like a friend or family member.
That’s how I lived my life! One long prayer or letter to God until I fell asleep at night whispering Amen. Looking back, maybe I should have signed off with Love, Sherri and kept the letter writing theme going but Amen seemed more… official or right or grown-up or I don’t know…
Anyway, It was like one continuous conversation with God, with little breaks here and there for work, school, family… and so on but…
Somewhere a long the way, I seemed to worry about being so juvenile, suddenly, I wanted my prayers to sound, well, like a grown-up! I wanted to sound smart and like other religious people. I wanted to sound like I knew what I was doing.
I read somewhere about keeping a prayer journal and actually writing down your prayers so I started doing that! At first, they all started with Dear God but eventually, and maybe this is when it really got started (or ended), I tried to make them sound “better”…
Gracious God,
Loving God,
Heavenly Father,
You get the idea. I would try to pour my heart out in these written prayers but still wanted to sound ‘smart’ so sometimes it became a struggle.
You know, looking back, I think that when I started writing out my prayers, my constant conversation with God ended. I was no longer talking to God in my mind all day.
I still prayed during the day other times than just the written prayer but it was different.
Honestly, I miss those days of the constant conversation with God and Jesus. I miss sharing every waking breathing moment with them the way a child does to their parent or to friends. (Even though they were there for it the whole time.)
And you know what? I don’t think there was anything wrong with praying that “juvenile” way. It was just wonderful that that relationship was there at all!
That is what this whole thing is all about anyway! Having a relationship with God, with Jesus. Jesus was very relational in his teachings, he was constantly trying to bring the people into a closer relationship with God. He wanted to draw us all nearer to God so that we could talk to God in a way that helped us feel near to the heart of God.
That’s my goal for this season of Lent, to find the heart of God, to learn again how to be in a relationship with Jesus and God. My own personal relationship, one, not worrying about how smart I sound or grown up or religious. Just a personal relationship that goes both ways with authenticity.
Dear God,
It’s me Sherri, with my friends, thank you for bringing us together for this journey towards you and also just for this journey of life together. Please draw us nearer to your heart that we might learn to live and love the way Jesus taught.
In his name,
Amen.
Until next time,
♥️ Sherri
Simply Sherri 
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