My world seems crazy. I say my world because well, it feels like the world but it’s really mostly just the United States, which for the most part is my world. Things here are insane. It’s crazy what is going on around me. It’s affecting me, my spirit and my health. I’m uncertain how to even live in this kind of world.
There’s no point in pointing out all the crazy things going on because it’s all right there on display for everyone to see. You don’t even have to TRY to see it. In fact, if you don’t see it, it’s because you must be actively trying NOT see it.
Anyway, I was reading an article this morning and it was talking about the obvious racism taking place here and I was reminded of how I feel every time I go out and about these days.
I have this feeling of deep sorrow, of deep regret, almost of guilt, not my personal guilt but a …hmm… not sure of the correct word for this, a white guilt maybe?
When I’m out and about and I see people of color, this is how I feel. I can’t help but look at them and wonder how this affecting them, my heart hurts for them and I wonder if they will look at me and think I’m someone who supports this or supports those doing this. I am not.
I have the urge to go ask if I can hug them because I want them to know that I see them and that I DON’T support any of this! I want them to know that I am a safe place. That I am a friend, an ally, that I want to help and be present for them.
But that would be weird and I’m much to shy to do any of that so I just try to smile if our eyes meet and say hello with genuine care.
As I’m writing this I realize that it goes beyond just racism and people of color, I feel this same way about the LGBTQIA+ community, I feel this way about other women. When I look at young people, I feel a guilt that my generation is failing them and I just don’t know what to do to stop this descent into chaos. And I want all of them, the POC, LGBTQIA+, Women, children, all them to know that I support them, I am here for them, I am a safe place.
I do what I can, I support justice organizations, organizations that help those in need and the marginalized, but it just doesn’t seem like enough. I need to do more, to be more but I don’t know how.
I don’t know why I’m sharing this. Maybe, it’s just therapy for myself to get it out of my head on to the page. Maybe it’s a way of sending a message to the universe hoping it will reach whoever needs to see it, so that they feel a little less alone or a little more cared for and loved, seen. I don’t know but here it is.
Whoever you are reading this… where ever you are… you are loved.
Until next time… ♥️
Simply Sherri 
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