The Lasts…

My Friends,  this is hard!  I awoke this morning thinking, this is the last time till Christmas I will make her favorite chocolate chip pancakes and I need to go to the store and get the milk to make them. And a silly tear slipped out of the corner of my eye… over milk… over pancakes…  Oh, I know, it was really for my sweet girl.

This is the first of the lasts until Christmas.  You know… her last Saturday… her last Sunday in church with us… Her last Sunday to play the piano for us… until Christmas.

These ‘lasts’ just may kill me!  Why does my mind work this way?  DH doesn’t think like this.  Why do I?  He’s all like… “Don’t think of it as lasts but as beginnings!”  I”m like, “well the lasts have to come before the beginnings!!”

Sometimes, I just wish I could hit the mute button on my brain.  It’s probably because it’s early…  She’s not up yet and we aren’t busy having fun yet.  DH is leaving town today and I woke up thinking about her sleeping with me when he’s gone and how she and the dog crowd me at night… and then I remembered the dog is gone and how much I’ll miss being crowded by them.

I also, missed a couple of doses of My New Best Friend yesterday, so that could be it too.  I won’t do that again!!  But most likely, it’s just that I love my darling daughter and will miss her too much for words.  Face it.  There are going to lots of tears over the next week…(weeks)… and that’s ok.  I’ll fight them back best I can so that they don’t interrupt our time together too much.  We’ve got lots to do still!  Lots more memories to make to last us the next few months.  I can do this!