Day 5

Okay so this weird, but as I grabbed my bible this morning, looking for today’s reading, the end of yesterday’s reading glared at me. I mean it just jumped off the page so I’m going to start there and it may be all I do… I haven’t decided yet.  We will see…

So, this morning I’m starting with John 11: 44.  Lazarus walks out of the tomb and he is all bound up with linen strips, and Jesus says, “Unbind him, and let him go.”

Those words just kind of shone for me. Unbind him. Let him go.

Since I’ve been thinking about Lent being a time of dying to myself, this really struck me.  Kind of an immediate answer to that, what does this mean for me, right here, right now?

Is this a metaphor? Is it supposed to be a metaphor for future generations like us?  Is that how I’m supposed to read this?

I have no idea if Jesus really performed this miracle, I wasn’t there, and honestly, I don’t really care.  What I do care about is like I said, what does this mean for me? How does it pertain to my life?

And this morning, as I opened my Bible, and these words seemed to be bigger than the other words on the page, for a moment, I couldn’t help but think they held a message for me.  

“Unbind him, and let him go.”

Have I been bound up? Clinging to myself? Have I been holding myself hostage?  Hiding myself away?  How am I bound up?

It almost seemed to say to me, Sherri, Unbind yourself, let yourself go.

I’ve been sitting here watching that little cursor blink for a few minutes now… What does this mean and how do I do it?

Several things came to mind.  One, I’m doing it. I have unbound myself and am writing these posts with out editing out what I’m afraid of others judging or condemning or lashing out at me.  I’m being real and it feels right, it feels unbound.

Two – DH and I went out yesterday and looked at some property.  We’ve been kind of looking for awhile but this is the first time we’ve really gone out and visited an open house.  We discovered that particular property wasn’t for us but I think it was a great step for us.  We unbound ourselves to go and look at something we’ve been wanting for years but get nervous and never do. 

I’ve wanted a homestead for years… like 25 years or more… Our last home I played at it a little… I planted a garden, I put up a clothesline, I did a little preserving.  I had been cooking a lot from scratch for years but I continued it and I started teaching my kids a little about all of this too.  

When we moved here, I tried a garden… over and over again and well, I’m going with the story that the soil here is different.  LOL. Even though I built a square foot garden and made the soil… Maybe it was too much sun or not enough… I don’t know but my garden has failed over and over… except for the mint.  It is thriving and DH wants to tear it out.  I think it also had to do with my allergies keeping me inside more here, but that sounds like an excuse.

Anyway, I feel like yesterday, when we went out to start looking at properties, we were finally coming unbound.  We have started a plan and I think we just might finally make this happen soon!

How do we bind ourselves up?  Why do we?

Maybe because we are afraid?  Risk is scary.  All kinds are, whether it be financial risk, or vulnerability with our ideas, or even just risking rejection, all kinds of rejection.  Maybe it’s time to unbind myself and let me be me. Take the risk to be say and do all that I’m called to do.

Unbind me and let me go and let’s see what I can do.

I think this is a lot to think about today, so this is going to be it, I’ll move on tomorrow.

Until next time… ♥️ 

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