How are you doing at it? The Art of Life? Personally, I think I’m failing a bit. I created this category here on the blog thinking it’d be fun to share recipes, crafts, life, but lately I feel like I’m barely hanging on by a thread.
Oh, I’ve been cooking some and crocheting some, taking photos but the life part? Bleh…
I know, we’re in the middle of a global pandemic, maybe I should cut myself some slack… but…
That’s actually what this post is about it. Lately, I’ve been stressed out of mind. My body is a ball of knots!
I woke up this morning like I often do. Feeling sleepy…
On Monday’s I let myself sleep in… to 6:45 this morning. I rolled out of bed got dressed, brushed my teeth and headed down to the family room for some yoga. Ahh… it felt amazing and I felt pretty good too!
Then I took the dog for a little walk and chatted with my mom while I did.
Then I prepared breakfast for DD and myself. At this point I started rushing about trying to get it all done before DD had to leave… she wanted eggs and sausage and I wanted oatmeal and fruit. The tea kettle had come apart and I started freaking out trying to fix it, all while trying not to burn breakfast. (I begin to feel the knots tightening again.)
I fed the dog and we went out to the patio to eat. That was lovely.
Then it was time for DD to go to work. I pulled a few weeds as I waved bye to her and then went in to put the dishes away, change out of my workout clothes and get to work myself… only I was exhausted! I felt like I needed nap already! What is wrong with me? Needing a nap by 9:30am?
All that is to say that yeah, I’m not living all that well right now. I’m stressed to my eyeballs, I’m tired and my body hurts. I’m starting to realize how very stressed I am and how much tension I’m carrying around with me… Not ok.
Upon realizing this yesterday, I decided to take a nice warm bath by candle light. No phone, no reading, just pure relaxation. I took an hour and a half bath! It was nice only… I couldn’t turn off my mind!! I had turned on some ocean waves sounds, thinking it would help me calm and let go… be a distraction… it would work for minute until I’d remember one more thing I needed to do… I tried to force myself to relax… is that even possible? To force relaxation? I don’t really think so because when I got out, I was even more tired! And felt worse too…
I did decide while I was in the bath that I definitely need a vacation but I don’t even know how to do that… One because of COVID and two because there is always more that I need to do, whether at home or for work.
All I know is that I’ve got to figure something out soon or my health is really going to suffer… I’m afraid it already is. This morning though, I allowed myself the rest even at 9:30am. I laid down and tried to just be still. I tried to quiet my mind but… at least I was still for about 30 minutes.
That is one thing I think I’ll do for myself as I need it… REST, even if just for 10 minutes. It’s okay to lay down when your body needs it.
Another thing I’m going to do for myself is get off FACEBOOK!!!! It’s been causing me way too much stress and anxiety. I can’t take the ugliness anymore.
I’m going to keep up my yoga and walking and work really hard to eat better. I love to cook but too often I’m just too tired so then we eat junk and that only makes me feel worse.
I’m going to simplify my church stuff some… I say that but it’s the time of year where there are loads of reports to do so… I’m going to do my best and try really hard to not put too much pressure on myself. It is what it is and I’m only one person.
I’ve been failing at the art of life lately because I seldom spend time living… only working…. It’s time for me to slow way down and do things I enjoy, to get in nature, to love myself more.
So, maybe… I’ll start filling this category again as I learn to live again.